I think… when we are not sure about a person’s presence in our lives – be it a friendship or romantic partner or what – we must listen to that sense of uncertainty.
Especially if we are considering giving them a seat at our table.
For me recently this has shown up as resistance, reluctance… not knowing. Trying my hardest to figure out if I should really let this person in on a deeper level, even when my body, heart, and soul were screaming “NO.”
So I stopped trying so hard to figure it out with my mind.
I watched as my heart surrounded itself with a protective layer and then gave it time to slowly remove that protective layer.
And then without even trying, i noticed the resistance and reluctance ease up. I felt my heart open up. WITHOUT EVEN TRYING.
It just feels like… clarity. It just feels like knowing what the right thing for me to do is. I don’t have to hem and haw.
The answers start becoming so crystal clear when we let the heart lead. If you are even in that position of hemming and hawing over whether to date a person or maintain a friendship with someone who treats you less than, don’t TRY to make any decisions.
See if you can just sit with the feelings in your heart and the somatic sensations in your body. What are the messages you are receiving?
Often when we do this a ton of emotional shit will surface. You may find yourself punching a pillow, or screaming at the top of your lungs in the woods, or on your bedroom floor curled up beside you dog bawling your eyes out.
Do what your human self needs to do to really let these emotions flow and move. They are energy, and they want to move! Allow these emotions to move through you.
You can think of it like you are releasing any old baggage or beliefs that aren’t even yours – beliefs you’ve picked up along the way that have influenced how you’ve been in relationship, how you’ve chosen your people… and you can release these beliefs now.
Make room for new ones that YOU create. From YOUR HEART. You will start to feel the difference between knowing whether or not a person, an opportunity, a place is right for you or not – in that moment. You will learn to feel it in your bones and your heart.
You will know what a “NO” feels like – and in this NO you are really saying yes to honoring your soul.