Category Archives: Writing

Sometimes SELF-LOVE Looks Like This…

Are you going to run & hide?
Or are you going to grow?

When we are confronted with a challenge – we have a choice.

We can choose to run and hide and attempt to escape our problem. Out of fear for what we might feel or how difficult it might be to navigate the challenge. This is acting from, guess where… FEAR.

At first fear may feel like the easier road. But in reality it just means we are running from our pain, problems etc. and these things we attempt to avoid will keep coming up. Until we confront them, accept our circumstances and move through. Which sometimes can feel like trudging through sludge.

But this is the path of growth … of LOVE. Which may at first feel more difficult. Especially if we are used to acting from a fear place.

When we choose the path of growth each time we experience contrast (conflict, challenges, problems etc.) it gets easier. Yes it can seem to be more work. The work is so worth it.

The work my dears … is actually self-love. The work is asking ourselves the tough questions and really truly searching within for how we can grow.

This is love. 

Not avoiding, running, hiding.
But facing head-on.
Being brave to accept the current situation no matter how challenging it may seem.

This is love my darlings.

Sending you all the love and light in the world,

MC
Interested in 1:1 Intuitive Coaching, Reiki, Yoga or meditation with Maggie? Click here to get started.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

When things don’t go your way {and what you can do}

Sometimes the day just doesn’t unfold in the way that you wanted or expected it to. Today, for example, I had these grand visions of putting the finishing touches on an outdoor program I’ve been wanting to launch for WEEKS in June. I keep changing thing around and succumbing to my own self-doubt. Well that stops here as I’ve just realized what I’ve been doing! Also because of my self-doubt I distracted myself with things like: planning a trip to Florida to visit family, hypothetical online shopping, copious cups of tea and seltzer water, playing with my animals, and you get the picture.

 

But so here’s the realization that I have just come to…

It is wonderful to set intentions and have “soft-goals” we want to reach toward. But it’s like setting ourselves up for failure if we have high hopes for a particular day going a certain way and then it just taking a turn. Because so often when it takes that “turn” that might be the exact thing we need.

 

We tend to catalog our lives into good things that happen for us and bad things that happen TO us. When in reality – EVERYTHING in life happens for us – whether we think it is good or bad is not important because that is our good ol’ ego getting in our way.

 

So in this moment I’m softening to this ‘non-productive’ day. I’m letting it be what it is. Because I’m also acknowledging my brain needed a rest. I’m also acknowledging the energy and effort it takes to work with clients 1:1 and teach a class on top (because my schedule today is at max capacity with that!).

 

In my “down time” when I’m not with clients, instead of freaking out about all the things I could be doing, I’m going to ease into each moment. Let myself get distracted away from my computer and phone because clearly this is something I could use!

 

And finally … I am sharing this with you because this is real. A lot of what we see on social media is a pretty picture, a slice of life. And things don’t always work out swimmingly. Sometimes we feel a little stuck or uninspired. And I think in those moments what we need most is to take a step back. Maybe even rest. But be especially loving and kind to yourself when things aren’t going “your way.” And you’ll see that in fact things are going EXACTLY the way you need them to 🙂

Tagged , , , , , , ,

On Self-Love

How do you practice self-love and empowerment?

Self-love.

It used to just mean doing nice things for myself or saying nice things to myself. And then just waiting for the good feelings and the shifts of finally feeling self-love to come..

But it wasn’t until recently when a coach (Amy Fiedler – look her up, she’s amazing) highlighted this one aspect of self-love that I was missing:

Acknowledge when you are kind to yourself.
Acknowledge when you do something loving.

Even the little things like getting out of bed in the morning. And this is especially if you are having trouble finding acts of love.

But be amazed at how compassionate you are with yourself. How patient. How kind.

Acknowledge all of it and THIS is going to shift your mindset and your entire way of being.

These thoughts will soon replace the self-loathing, negative, unkind thoughts.

So instead of trying to stop those thoughts you simply (and slowly) replace them with the self-loving thoughts.

Bottom line: I practice self-love all the time. Some examples:
-taking my time to make and eat my breakfast in the morning
-making sure i have a full glass of water first thing when i wake up
-prioritizing time to write
-going for a hike with Daisy
-meditating

And I ACKNOWLEDGE the fact that I am so loving to myself. I allow myself to receive this love.

That is so key to this process. You have to acknowledge the love you are giving yourself, otherwise you’re not going to receive it.

Got it?

How do YOU practice self-love? I’d love to hear in the comments!

XO Maggie

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,

How I healed myself from my eating disorder

I healed myself from my eating disorder.

How?

Yoga

Meditation

Journaling and writing

Nature

Mindfulness

Breath awareness

But what this all ultimately amounted to was that I was (at times unknowingly) cultivating a spiritual practice.

I think I’ve always been spiritual but wasn’t fully aware of it until this past decade of spiritual growth.

And I read a sign the other day when I took a trip to my local dispensary that read:

Faith is not believing God can, it’s knowing that he will.

And insert any word you prefer for God: source, the Universe, vortex, nature, etc.

In my path to healing I always had the knowingness that I was not on this journey alone. I didn’t have a word for what (or who) was supporting and guiding me, but I always had faith that I was never alone.

Because for the human body and mind alone to recover from ANYTHING is a gargantuan task. In any recovery and healing process, we are always supported.

Whether that support comes in the way of discovering a meditation practice or stumbling upon teachers, coaches, and therapists that are able to guide you in just the right direction … or a book that truly illuminates what you have been wondering all along …

Universal support and guidance is ALWAYS available to you. You simply have to open up your body, mind, and soul to receive that guidance.

It does not mean that you don’t do any of the work. But that most of the work is in turning inward, getting quiet, and leaving space for that guidance to appear.

And so it was the tools of yoga, meditation, and writing that enabled me to open up this space for my spiritual intuition and connection to strengthen.

So that I was able to recognize (and to this day STILL recognize) when I was potentially harming myself – emotionally, physically, physiologically, etc.

And if I felt I could not do it alone, I asked for guidance.

I ask for guidance every single day. In every situation imaginable.

Again – this does NOT mean that I just sit there and wait for shit to happen. But when I take action, I do so with deep awareness. And I listen and I look for the guidance.

And guess what?

The guidance ALWAYS appears.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

When we feel a need for validation or approval…

I wonder if in that moment of feeling like we NEED someone else’s guidance, authority, approval, validation, etc. it means what we really need is to turn inward toward our own intuition and internal wisdom and guidance.

In those moments when we are scrambling for an answer…

For someone to point us in the right direction…

What if we were to let go and let God? Just, turn it over to the Universe. Get big on trust. Even ask for a sign. But the asking has to come from a loving, trusting, BIG YOU place. Not from your ego….

Turn inward and get quiet the next time you feel like you desperately need something from someone. And just see what happens.

Please feel free to share what you notice in the comments! I noticed a feeling of lightness when I turned this feeling of desperation and need for validation over the the Universe. I remembered my inner compass and intuition is strong and I am more powerful than I realize. I am eager to hear from you!

Need a meditation to get you grounded? Click here for my free meditations – available for a limited time! XO

Tagged , , ,

Keep the channel open.

There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open.
-Agnes de Mille to Martha Graham
I shared this exactly one year ago today (it showed up in my news feed – thanks FB!). And isn’t it remarkable how the universe provides you with exactly the right message at EXACTLY the right time?
 
Because I am working on fine-tuning my coaching offering. To something that feels remarkably … like me! It’s like it’s the something that has been brewing and building in me all along. And I needed all the experiences I’ve been through in order to create and make this offering.
 
The thing is… for a moment I started to have a pang of fear, of doubt, just this morning. That maybe it’s not good enough. That maybe my offering is not what the world wants. But truly, it is NOT my business to determine how good or how valuable my offering is.
 
If it feels like an authentic expression of myself, that is enough.
 
If there is something you are aching to do, some way of expressing yourself that you have been teetering on, I encourage you to act through the lens of love and keep moving forward with that authentic expression of you. Because ONLY YOU can offer it up to the world.
 
Tagged , , , , , ,

Acceptance and Love

I awoke one morning this week after a particularly intense dream in which I received a very clear message:

Acceptance is a pathway to Love.

I sat with this dream for a few days and the very clear message I felt. I wrote the following in my journal that I’d love to share with you:

To find self-love, you need self-acceptance. Love comes through acceptance. Acceptance is a pathway to LOVE. What do I mean by this? Accepting your truth – and the truth around you. ALL. OF. IT.

Meaning that we can’t just accept the parts of ourselves that are easy to accept. In order to really connect and plug into love, we’ve got to also accept the parts of ourselves that are maybe a little more difficult to accept.

The more we practice the above, the less these parts of ourselves seem difficult to accept. The way that I see it, is that through ACCEPTANCE we cultivate a neutral perspective. We stop categorizing “This is good” vs. “This is bad.” Instead, everything JUST IS. Everything becomes a learning opportunity. A chance to grow. We allow ourselves to just be and to continue to evolve. AND … We stop seeing those “hard to love” parts of ourselves as unacceptable or bad.

And over time, the more we practice acceptance all parts of ourselves – our achievements, our successes, our failures, our mistakes, our hidden talents, our not so great habits – we begin to naturally plug into love.

With determination and sincerity we return to the practice of acceptance (it’s not always easy) over and over again. We wake up one morning and something clicks. We are plugged into love.

We may slip and veer away from love from time to time, but once we’ve plugged in, we can always find our way back.

Thank you for allowing me to share this with you. I always welcome your questions, findings, and observations.

With Love,
Maggie

Tagged , , , , , , ,

One day I decided NO MORE

I know how to do the hard stuff. That doesn’t mean the hard stuff isn’t hard. Or that it doesn’t feel like work.

I know how to muck through shit.

Why?

Because I’ve mucked through shit before. I’ve had to completely re-haul my patterns, my habits, my behaviors and my beliefs around my body, food, exercise, and my self-worth.

And do you know that I did a lot of it {at first} on my own?

Of course I reached out to people when I FINALLY freakin’ realized “It’s OK to ask for help!” And then those people got me even further on my path of doing the work.

But it’s a powerful realization to sit down with: You can alter your patterns, habits, behaviors, and beliefs.

It’s a journey.

And I’m going to tell you, the most difficult part of the journey {for me anyway} is saying I want to make these shifts. Is saying I want help.

Not just from this person and that person and this other person over there. But accepting help… no wait … RECEIVING help in the myriad of ways it comes to you.

One day I decided NO MORE with my eating disorder. I was probably mid-forward fold in yoga class. Sweating through my tank top. And I made this decision on my own. For myself.

No one said to me: Maggie, you have to stop.

No one said to me: Maggie, no more.

Actually, that’s not entirely true.

Because I said it to me! I decided I was done. I decided I WANTED to change the way I treated myself. I decided I wanted to change my relationship with myself.

I decided I was ready to take my emotional journey one step further.

I decided it was time to turn down (way down) the volume on self-hate and self-loathing.

I didn’t decide because someone told me. Because hardly anybody knew in the first place!

This is not to say there’s no room for support from others. This is not to say there’s no room for interventions in this world.

But the person in the seat of “needing change” has GOT to be the one to ultimately flip the switch and choose the direction of their emotional, physical, and spiritual journey.

This is so powerful to me because when I am confronted with a new challenge, a new pattern in my life to shift {example: I did it with my romantic relationships!} I know that I can do it.

Does it mean it’s gonna be easy peasy? NOPE. It’s still gonna be damn hard.

Does it mean it’s gonna be so worth it? YES.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Opening Up About My Experience in Relationships

This morning I woke up feeling shitty.
Migraine and broken hearted.
Not just over my most recent split, but all of them.
There is a voice in me saying – come clean.
You’ve hidden all of this for far too long to keep it up and put on a brave face.
My heart is full of scars that have not fully healed and it’s coming to a head.

All of it.
The men. The relationships.
The stories I’ve clung to that have built up resentment.
The roles I not only played but also identified with.

Whenever a relationship took a turn for the worse, I’d turn to food or controlling my appearance somehow [running, over-exercising, or dieting].
I focused on: how do I control?
Instead of: How do I leave room to heal?
It was always brush it under the rug.
Drop them. Drop him.
Let him go.

Well, I did let him go. Every time.
Maybe a little too much.
I moved right on to the next one. Without a second thought.

But the residual pain clung tightly – wrapped around my heart.
Tighter and tighter as time passed.

And it brings me to right now.
Piles of relationships and breakups never fully processed.
All of the pain is coming to the surface.

I bounce from one memory to the next in my dreams and in meditation.
Uncovering decisions I make now that are based on past experiences.
Not always proud of the way I treated people.
Often wishing I’d let myself be single and process.
And witnessing the shame I feel about not processing these break-ups the “right way.”

Now I’m processing them in my way.
On my terms.
In my own time.
I’m giving these experiences the attention they deserved.
Maybe they should have received this attention years ago.
But I’m here now and doing the best I can.

I’m grateful that something in my last relationship called this to my attention.
Maybe because of the mild depression I felt in the springtime.
A clear indication that there was pain that had not been dealt with.
Maybe because I started finding my voice and stepping into my power.
For the first time clearly articulating my deepest desires.

This is not easy stuff to share.
The easy way would be to brush it under the rug and keep the notes in my journal and tell the world “I’m fine.”
The more difficult path is doing this: share.
Share and tell my truth.
Stop withholding from the world and from myself.

Because … Why on earth would we ever cover up any parts of ourselves?

Tagged , , , , ,

What will be great about today?

I sometimes wake up in a mindset of lacking or scarcity and I fixate on what’s not going well or what I don’t have. It could be from a dream or anxiety I took to bed with me from the night before.

 

When this happens, I wake up feeling lacking and I go through my morning ritual – rise, rinse face, drink water and coffee, meditate – hoping that it will shake the feeling of scarcity. The feeling that I am not doing enough, not creating enough, not putting enough out into the world, on my website, on social media, in a newsletter…

 

But then someone asked me a question this morning: What will be great about today?

 

And I was flooded with so many answers…

 

A new trail run with a good friend.

Valuing my time.

Teaching.

Morning meditation with my two cats curled in my lap.

Hot coffee and flax granola for breakfast.

Nature.

Time to write. TIME TO WRITE!

Waking up later than 5AM.

Seeing you.

Listening to music in my car.

 

This question made me notice all the abundance in my life, in my today.

It made the “not enough”-ness seem like more than enough.

 

Ask yourself the question: What will be great about today?

IMG_8834

Tagged , , ,