Category Archives: Meditation

But what if they judge me?

Sometimes when I pour my heart out to someone I am left with a gaping hole.

How will it be received?

How will they respond?

Will what I said even make sense?

 

And if it’s on a Sunday (or a day when I don’t have a whole lot to do) I’ll pace around the house.

Making myself an extra cup of coffee.

Reading a few pages of a book.

Check my phone.

Then picking up my book only to read the same paragraph 3 times over.

Because my mind is just focusing on one thing:

 

What if they judge me?

What if they leave me?

What if they abandon me?

 

Because I shared something in my heart that felt like truth, that felt like there was no other option but to share this particular something…

 

And then I read and hear what I’ve just shared with you above:

 

What if they judge / leave / abandon me?

 

And I come to realize that the real crux of the matter here, is this:

 

What if I judge / leave / abandon me?

 

I know, when I feel this uneasy and worried about receiving validation from another human being, in a very specific form, it is a deep call to stand by my own side. It is a reminder to relinquish judgment and embrace the ways in which I express love and emotions. It is a call to do the things that make me feel cared for.

 

I show up for myself in the way that I show up for my dear friends when they are feeling uneasy.

 

I show up and trust that no matter how the world and its inhabitants may waver around me (and waver they will), I’ve always got a safe place deep within the chambers of my heart and the vessel of my physical form.

 

Show up for yourself today, the way you would for your best friend.

 

Contact me for Intuitive and Recovery Coaching specials running through November by clicking here.

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Sometimes yoga looks like three folding chairs. {yoga of recovery}

Sometimes yoga looks like three fold-up chairs in a group therapy room that smells like coffee. And you talk about the things you feel ashamed of, you share the things you think no one wants to hear because you are afraid they will judge you or not accept you or not love you.

And you use this space to practice being you. You use this space to practice being human.

And you find out that the other dude has a similar story to mine and I’ve known him for X months and we never shared this.

Because yoga looks like intimacy. Looks like trust. Looks like holding space for someone, no matter what.

Oh and then maybe we do some poses, or we just keep talking for the remaining 26 minutes or something. And sometimes you hear a story that breaks your heart and you’re so damn grateful that the person is there, sitting across from you telling their story.

You’re so damn grateful that they weren’t successful at giving up on this life. You’re so damn grateful they are here telling you how grateful they are for the simple things in their life, the things they always took for granted.

And you realize how grateful you are for everyone who has ever held space for you. Who has ever listened to you and let you open up. And just BEEN there.

It is truly a gift that we get to surround ourselves with these people as we grow older. I’m grateful for all the souls who hold space for me. 


To just be me. 

#thankyouthankyouthankyou

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Take Care Through Transitions

Right now I am really being asked to walk the talk. To practice what I preach as a teacher and coach.

What I mean by this is:
I have to move out of my house and this is totally unplanned (at least by my human existence, I’m sure The Universe had something to do with this).

There is a serious mold situation and so in the past 2 days I have packed up and moved as many of my belongings as my little Subaru can hold. Taking several trips to and from my parents house, finding a place for my cats to stay, and all the while making the time to take care of myself.

I always encourage my clients (and really all my people – that includes family, friends, etc.) that when we are in the midst of transition or a life crisis or whatever you want to call it, you must remember to take care of yourself even when it feels like you have no time.

We go through a lot of our lives using that excuse:
“I have no time” I all too often hear people say.
No time to meditate.
No time to slow down.
No time to sit and read a book for fun.

But as I move through this major upheaval of moving myself, my dog, my cats, my belongings, I am making sure I create moments to check in with myself.

I make sure I eat full meals.
I make sure I shower and put on clean clothes.
I make sure I meditate.
I make sure I move mindfully (yoga, running, walks with my dog).
I make sure I get enough rest.

Just last night I had plans to meet a friend for dinner but after I showered and put on clothes I decided I needed to rest. I had been going from 9:30am to 5pm – packing, loading the car, unloading the car, unpacking.

And especially when we are going through something traumatic, we must tend to our souls.

Whether it is a change in job, moving, the end of a relationship, the loss of a loved one (human or furry)… we must tend to our souls. It can be so easy to get swept up in the to-do list or feeling overwhelmed by the situation – feeling at a loss of how little control we actually have of what happens around us.

But what this precise situation is showing me is this: what I can control is my internal experience.

I can allow space to feel the sadness of having to leave the home I just set up (5 months ago) or the sadness of temporarily having to separate from my cats.

I can feel that but I can also choose to nourish myself.

I don’t entertain the feelings of doubt. Or thoughts of “how could I have prevented this?”

That doesn’t even enter my mind! (<<< that’s growth right there!)

I trust that this is where I am meant to be right now.

Yes, it totally stinks. It is totally hard.

But I am already seeing a lot of beauty coming from this.

Like fully acknowledging the generosity of other human beings; as I lean into them, and the universe for support.

So what happens to you when you experience an upheaval – big or small? How do you respond?

I have many great suggestions of meditation apps, websites, YouTube channels for you. I also have two free meditations on my website that you can access here. Of course meditation is merely one resource.

I’d love to hear from you, as always – and I promise to reply to your comments! 🙂

Sending light, always.

XO
Maggie

PS. I sent this out today to my email list. If you’d like to receive notes like this, you can get them here >>> http://eepurl.com/czLI35

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Sometimes SELF-LOVE Looks Like This…

Are you going to run & hide?
Or are you going to grow?

When we are confronted with a challenge – we have a choice.

We can choose to run and hide and attempt to escape our problem. Out of fear for what we might feel or how difficult it might be to navigate the challenge. This is acting from, guess where… FEAR.

At first fear may feel like the easier road. But in reality it just means we are running from our pain, problems etc. and these things we attempt to avoid will keep coming up. Until we confront them, accept our circumstances and move through. Which sometimes can feel like trudging through sludge.

But this is the path of growth … of LOVE. Which may at first feel more difficult. Especially if we are used to acting from a fear place.

When we choose the path of growth each time we experience contrast (conflict, challenges, problems etc.) it gets easier. Yes it can seem to be more work. The work is so worth it.

The work my dears … is actually self-love. The work is asking ourselves the tough questions and really truly searching within for how we can grow.

This is love. 

Not avoiding, running, hiding.
But facing head-on.
Being brave to accept the current situation no matter how challenging it may seem.

This is love my darlings.

Sending you all the love and light in the world,

MC
Interested in 1:1 Intuitive Coaching, Reiki, Yoga or meditation with Maggie? Click here to get started.

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How I learned to slow down and stop over-exercising

The more time I spent going on hikes and exploring parks and trails, the more I realize that time spent in nature has greatly helped curate my perspective on movement and exercise.

 

Nature forced me to slow down.

 

I spent years swimming in lakes and oceans, cycling through hills and mountains, and running roads and trails. This was all in the name of triathlons, half-marathons, half-ironmans, dozens of 5ks and 10ks, a marathon, and an ironman.

 

The irony is not lost on me that it was my training for various races, over the course of about 5 years, that got me spending more and more time outside. To the point that outside became my most favorite place in the world (maybe second to curled up on the couch with a dog and a good book.)

 

Moving back to CT several years ago I found myself hiking and running trails in Easton, Redding, and Weston. I got a dog and spent even more time exploring local trails. I started booking trips not around races, but around nature – national parks, seashores, and other hidden treasures the earth had to show me.

 

I couldn’t exactly pinpoint it but I always felt like I couldn’t spend enough time outside. Even with bugs, heat, and humidity – I wanted more.

 

There was something big I was receiving. Some intangible yet powerful gift.

 

I was learning to slow down. Nature evolves at its own pace and I wanted to absorb every morsel I could. Every sound, every smell, every glimmer of sunlight through the trees. Every sweeping vista and mucky footprint. All of it. I felt a profound connection to something greater than myself.

 

My eyes welled with tears and I was rendered speechless when I first saw the Grand Canyon and Yosemite Valley. I wanted to feel this humility over and over again. Even by the babbling brooke on the trail in the town where I grew up reminded me of mother nature’s vastness and simplicity all at once.

 

So I kept hiking and I kept seeing and I kept feeling. And I began choosing a walk in the woods over pumping iron at the gym (don’t get me wrong – I still lift heavy things on occasion). I began listening much more acutely to the wishes of not just my body, but of my soul.

 

Now I fully acknowledge when I need the groundedness of the earth beneath my feet. I’ll touch a tree as I make my way down a trail and even when running through the woods, I’m no longer in a hurry.

 

And you can bet money this movement has nothing to do with burning calories or getting a yoga butt or anything like that.

 

It’s about feeling freedom. It’s about simplicity. It’s about being humbled by something much greater than myself. And it’s just about the deepest gratitude I have ever known in my human existence thus far.

 

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How I healed myself from my eating disorder

I healed myself from my eating disorder.

How?

Yoga

Meditation

Journaling and writing

Nature

Mindfulness

Breath awareness

But what this all ultimately amounted to was that I was (at times unknowingly) cultivating a spiritual practice.

I think I’ve always been spiritual but wasn’t fully aware of it until this past decade of spiritual growth.

And I read a sign the other day when I took a trip to my local dispensary that read:

Faith is not believing God can, it’s knowing that he will.

And insert any word you prefer for God: source, the Universe, vortex, nature, etc.

In my path to healing I always had the knowingness that I was not on this journey alone. I didn’t have a word for what (or who) was supporting and guiding me, but I always had faith that I was never alone.

Because for the human body and mind alone to recover from ANYTHING is a gargantuan task. In any recovery and healing process, we are always supported.

Whether that support comes in the way of discovering a meditation practice or stumbling upon teachers, coaches, and therapists that are able to guide you in just the right direction … or a book that truly illuminates what you have been wondering all along …

Universal support and guidance is ALWAYS available to you. You simply have to open up your body, mind, and soul to receive that guidance.

It does not mean that you don’t do any of the work. But that most of the work is in turning inward, getting quiet, and leaving space for that guidance to appear.

And so it was the tools of yoga, meditation, and writing that enabled me to open up this space for my spiritual intuition and connection to strengthen.

So that I was able to recognize (and to this day STILL recognize) when I was potentially harming myself – emotionally, physically, physiologically, etc.

And if I felt I could not do it alone, I asked for guidance.

I ask for guidance every single day. In every situation imaginable.

Again – this does NOT mean that I just sit there and wait for shit to happen. But when I take action, I do so with deep awareness. And I listen and I look for the guidance.

And guess what?

The guidance ALWAYS appears.

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THIS is the house of belonging

I have been thinking a lot about what it means
to feel a sense of belonging in our bodies and I shared
this with my email list this morning…

Because it’s about more than just loving our bodies.
It’s about a mindset that no one can fuck with my inner peace.

No one can tamper with my power.
No one can take away who I am at my core.

We only experience the above when
we ALLOW IT TO HAPPEN.

For example, someone once told me that I’m running
my business all wrong and how I should be running
my business completely differently.

This was unsolicited advice.
It came across very harsh. I thought the person
telling me all these things was mean and disrespectful.

And afterwards I felt completely deflated.
I blamed it on the person for months. I couldn’t shake it.

Until it hit me that I was allowing this person to tamper
with my power, my inner knowing, and my inner peace.

If anything this was a very valuable gift in
showing me this very lesson!

It took months for me to realize what was happening –
that I was the one putting myself down and questioning
myself by buying into and believing what this other person
said over my own beliefs.

When your inner knowing and intuition and connection to
your self and understanding of yourself are SO STRONG …

Not a single soul can mess with you.
Not a single soul can throw you off track.

We connect with that inner knowing through meditation, mindfulness,
and awareness throughout our entire day.

It’s a very simple concept. It’s not necessarily easy to get to that place,
but we ALL have the capacity to tap into our inner knowing and not get
so thrown off by external circumstances.

Because…
We always have this house of belonging, wherever we go.

Our bodies.

With Love,
Maggie

PS. Want more daily teachings and access to me?
Connect with me in one of my FB groups here:
>Living Beyond ED Recovery
>Belonging in The Body
XO

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The Diet Stops … HERE.

I’m re-launching my holistic health coaching program. I became a health coach many years ago because people kept asking me health-related questions and I wanted to be more informed and also because my sister was doing the program and it sounded interesting to me. Haha. Truth!

Becoming a health coach was an interesting process and initially once I became certified and got clients MOST of those clients just wanted to lose weight.

What I really wanted, at my core, was to teach people how to have a healthier relationship to food and exercise. And to do this from a spiritual place.

But I didn’t know how to say that. And actually I felt a little afraid people would judge or not want to work with me if I said the “S” word – spirituality.

Now, spirituality is a non-negotiable for me. All that really means is, I can’t not have it come up with the people I spend most of my time with. It doesn’t mean I force anything on anyone, but that the way I explain and understand most things in life comes from a spiritual place.

And so as I’m rebuilding my holistic health coaching program I am finally offering something that feels like a huge YES.

It feels like me because i’m not asking anyone to weigh themselves. EVER.
I’m not asking people to never eat certain foods.
I’m not asking people to watch as their waste band shrinks.

I mean, I never really asked people to do these things in the first place. But I feel more firm in my convictions now than ever.

I’m teaching people to love what they’ve already got.

OK, at the very least to accept what they’ve already got.

The body that God gave them.
The mind God gave them.
The soul God gave them.

You have to accept yourself and your circumstances, at all times. Or growth just will not happen. It might happen for a split second, but then you’ll go back to old habits and patterns.

So I ask this of my clients – accept yourself and your circumstances AT ALL TIMES. Then watch as you grow.

So growth starts from the place of true acceptance.

Once you get THAT ^^^ everything begins to fall into place.

That is a promise.

XO,
Maggie

PS. Stay tuned for the official announcement of my holistic health coaching program! If you want even more teachings like this and real-time video teachings from me, join my Spiritual Coaching for Living Beyond Recovery Facebook Group.

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Move because you are celebrating your body, not punishing it. Please.

Exercise is a whole different animal for me today than it was 12 years ago in the throes of my eating disorder. It’s even drastically different from how it was 1 year ago. Even 6 months ago.

 

I’m always growing. Allowing my soul to evolve and the more i let it rip and let my soul shine, the more fun I have.

 

To the point where playing with doing Bowspring on a Bosu ball at the gym gives me great joy. I feel like a kid playing with toys. My toys being the bosu ball and all the things i’ve learned and picked up along the way: yoga, lifting, running, bowspring.

 

Exercise is no longer about going to the gym and pounding out a workout. If it isn’t fun for me, i won’t do it. Like i took a barre class a couple weeks ago to try it out because it’s a part of my gym membership. But it was so boring and no offense to the teacher, she was doing her best. The class just didn’t resonate with me on a soul lifting level.

 

So i’ll go and i’ll challenge myself sometimes by doing workouts i find on pinterest or digging into my arsenal of exercises i’ve done with personal trainers.

 

Picking and choosing the things that are the most fun.

 

Like doing the stair climber and rocking out to “Sorry not sorry” — sorry not sorry to all the gym rats who gave me weird looks.

 

My point is – what’s the point of exercise if it does not elicit some joy? If you aren’t enjoying yourself?

 

I look around the gym sometimes to see the pained expression on so many people’s faces. Or I notice people checking themselves out in the mirror.

 

To be honest, my heart aches for them. I wish they could be in on my little secret.

 

But I know it took years and a lot of inner work to get to the place where I’m at.

 

There was a point in my life where I said i’d never again set foot in a gym. Not after how much abuse i put my body through over-exercising.

 

And now I am overjoyed that I can step foot in my gym and exercise as little or as much as i damn well feel like on any given day.

 

And you bet your butt I take days off. And relish in the rest.

 

Exercise and movement can be spiritual.

 

What’s not spiritual is exercising to look a certain way or to get rid of our belly or cellulite or whatever.

 

What is spiritual is exercising to bring ourselves closer to alignment. What is spiritual is exercise that makes you smile, laugh, or wanna dance. What is spiritual is feeling joy, elation, excitement, and celebration about life.

 

Move because you are celebrating your body, not punishing it. Please.

 

I wish you love in movement.

Maggie

Get more musings by signing up for my newsletter here —> http://eepurl.com/czLI35

Or join my free Facebook Group: Spiritual Living Beyond ED Recovery!

 

XOXO

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it all boils down to one thing: love

Sometimes I feel like I do so many different things. That i wear many different hats.
One day I’m with private yoga clients.
the next i’m at the recovery centers and then guiding a coaching client into their meditation practice.
and sometimes i feel like i wear too many hats…
but today i realized that all these “hats” are really just variations on a theme.
i work with people in the way that i can best connect with them.
whether it’s bowspring, yoga, meditation, health coaching, life coaching, or reiki… my intentions are always the same..

i hope and wish for people to feel aligned and connected.
i hope and wish for people to better understand and accept themselves.
i hope and wish for all people to know their purpose in life.
i hope and wish for people to know and understand that they are loved so that they may find unconditional, universal love. no matter the external circumstances.

i know that i’m good at what i do.
i know that i’m good at sharing my story.
i know that i’m good at reaching people.
i know that i’m good at holding space for people.

i know that i’m good at helping people understand that their bodies are a way to experience this planet, celebrate life, and feel joy.

if you’re interested in a class or 1:1 work with me in any capacity please use this link to connect with me. most of the work that i do IS customized. but it is all around creating connection. to your Self. to love.💖

CONNECT ⬇️⬇️⬇️

http://www.maggieconversemethod.com/connect-1/

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